*: Thoughts, an Alter-Ego, & Serenity

I was thinking the other day… you know how some people have alter egos? Like let's say Susan is a mother of two and works part-time. But her alter ego is Samantha, who is this ultra glamorous, super sexy, party all night kind of girl. Well I find these alter-egos interesting…because I think they say a lot about the individual and who they'd like to be.

I don't know about you, but I have an alter-ego and her name is Serenity. She's the person I desperately would like to be. She's inflappable in the midst of chaos, calm and relaxed. She's organized and balanced. Somehow she manages to get everything done and still find a little time for herself to be outdoors, exercise, meditate. In a very general and stereotyping sort of way - Serenity is a hippy, a nature loving, free spirit.

It took me a long time to find her…this person I want to be. And it's taking me even longer to become more like her. There's always some reason to put off making necessary changes. Something that comes up that needs to be done that pushes her further into the background. My mentality and to a lesser extent the energy I give off has moved more towards her level, but I'm still working towards my life being more like hers. It's my perpetual goal…seeking Serenity.

I guess I should elaborate a bit on how I'm moving towards this goal of mine. Right now it's kind of in little ways, like my way of thinking, recycling, eating habits, etc. I used to be quite the pessimist, but thanks to my awesome husband and a little time getting to know myself I realize that there are so many wonderful positive things to focus on. Why focus on all that negative? And why would I want to hang around people who are always bringing me down? This simply change in thought has lifted a huge weight off of me.

Growing up my mom always recycled. Ryan's family didn't. But I knew if I could find a recycling center in our area - I would most definitely put forth the effort to recycle. And lo and behold - a recycling bin is situated right in Sullivan across the street form the library. Awesome! So now we recycle all our glass, plastic, metal, etc. It may not help much, but it's something we can easily and affordably do.

Another thing I'm aligning with Serenity is through vegetarianism. Ultimately I'd like to be a raw foodist. But I've decided it would be better if I take it slow and ease my way into that natural food lifestyle. So for now - meat is not on my menu. I'm working on cutting back the cheese and starches next. What can I say? I'm Italian! I love a good cheesy pizza and warm garlic bread! But I'll slowly work my way there.

Now I'm going to start working the exercise back in too. It's been a long time since I've taken the time to improve myself physically. I've been so focused on work that I've kind of let my needs fall by the wayside. So I'm really looking forward to this new workout routine.

How about you? Do you have an alter-ego? Or some changes you'd really like to make? I'd love to hear your thoughts.